Readers, I’d like to share with you the story of an incredibly resilient and brave young man.
The first time I met this young man was at one of his baseball games. It was a warm spring evening, and I came prepared with snacks and drinks to support him, his brother, and his dad. He didn’t have to say anything, but he looked me in the eye and thanked me for bringing him a snack, even though we had just met. That moment stuck with me. His politeness and gratitude were genuine—a stark contrast to the behavior I’ve witnessed from his biological mother since that day.
Over the past 10 months, I’ve had the privilege of watching him grow and mature, despite the unimaginable challenges he has faced. He’s a living testament to resilience, navigating life’s upheavals with grace and strength far beyond his years. From the beginning, it was clear to me that he was someone special, someone who deserved all the love and stability that a family could provide.
His story is one marked by instability and a lack of control over some of the most formative decisions in his life. As a young child, he was taken away from his biological father and placed with extended family while his mother focused on her military career. At four years old, his mother introduced him to a new stepfather and made the decision to tell him that this man was his real dad—a story he believed for years. It wasn’t until he was 10, during a CPS case, that the truth finally came out, and he met his biological father for the first time that he could remember.
Despite these upheavals, he carries himself with a remarkable grace. He has his moments—he’s a preteen, after all—but he’s kind, thoughtful, and incredibly self-aware. He’s shown empathy in ways that continue to amaze me, like teaching his younger brother how to take slow, deep breaths when he’s upset. He’s even apologized on his own for behavior he felt crossed a line, without any prompting. He’s not just a “good kid.” He’s an extraordinary young man.
For Christmas this year, I wanted to give him a gift that symbolized everything I see in him: his strength, his worth, and the bright future I know he has ahead. I found a bracelet with an engraved message, a simple but heartfelt token meant to remind him that he is loved and supported unconditionally. It reads:
“Never forget how much I love you. As you grow older, you will face many challenges in life, just do your best. Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass; it’s all about learning how to dance in the rain.”
To me, this was more than a gift. It was a promise that, no matter the past or the obstacles ahead, he has people in his corner who love him and believe in him.
Unfortunately, even something as simple as this has become a point of contention. His mother expressed to him that she had “a problem” with the gift. I can’t imagine what part of a message of love and encouragement could be seen as an issue. But what truly breaks my heart is that she told him this. It wasn’t about the bracelet itself; it was about sending a message of negativity to her own child regarding a gesture meant to uplift him.
How do you explain that kind of behavior to a 12-year-old? How do you counteract the damage it might cause without disparaging his mother in the process? These are the questions I wrestle with as I try to support him through it all.
This young man deserves so much more than what life has handed him thus far. He deserves stability, love, and the chance to just be a kid without having to navigate adult-sized conflicts. Watching him grow despite all of this is inspiring, but it also fills me with a deep sense of responsibility. I want to be part of the foundation he can rely on, a constant in his ever-changing world.
After 10 months, I view him as my bonus son. He and his brother are my boys, and I love them just as much as any mother would. While I respect his biological mother’s rights, I will always be here to step up in any way she chooses to step down.
All I can really do for him now, is offer unconditional support. I hope that he continues to grow and mature into the impressive, kind, and considerate man that I know he will become. I hope that he remembers his dad and I are always here for him, regardless of anything that may happen. I hope he never forgets that he has a safe space to call his own here.
Where Hope Grows 